©
Maria Valtorta (Itália, ano 1897-1961) - Obra: "O Evangelho como me foi revelado" (1944-1950) [Judas Iscariot complains to the other apostles:] «Of course! Of course! I know, that you are all learned, experts, sensible, good, perfect people… You are everything! Everything! I only am the black sheep in the white herd!… I only am the bastard lamb, the disgrace that is disclosed and puts on ram-horns… I only am the sinner, the imperfect one, the cause of all the evil among us, in Israel, in the world… perhaps also in the stars… I cannot stand this any longer! Not so much because I see that I am the last, but because I see that nonentities, like those two fools who are speaking to the Master
[Jude refers to the apostles James and John], are admired as if they were two holy oracles, I am tired of…»
[Peter says:] «Listen, boy…» Peter begins to say, while red in the face not so much from the heat, as from his efforts in controlling himself.
But Judas Thaddeus interrupts him
[and says to Judas Iscariot]: «Are you judging other people by your own standard? Try and be a "nonentity" yourself like my brother James and John of Zebedee, and there will no longer be imperfections in the apostolic group.»
[Judas Iscariot says:] «See now, whether I am right! I am imperfection! Ah! that’s too much! But it is…»
[Thomas says:] «Yes, I think that it was too much the wine that Joseph made us drink and in this heat it is upsetting you… just a reaction of the blood…» says very calmly Thomas, to make a joke of the quarrel, which is about to arise.
410.2But Peter has worn out his patience and with set teeth and clenched fists to continue to master himself, he says: «Listen boy. There is one thing only advisable for you: part for a little while…»
[Judas Iscariot says:] «I? Part? By your order? The Master only can give me orders and I will obey Him only. Who are you? A poor…»
«An ignorant, coarse, good-for-nothing fisherman. You are right… I am the first to say that. And before the omnipresent all-seeing Jehovah, I testify that I would prefer to be the last instead of the first, I declare that I would like to see you or anybody else in my place, but you above all, so that you might be freed from the monster of jealousy, which makes you unfair, and I wish I had but to obey you, my boy… And believe me, it would cost me much less trouble than having to speak to you as the "first". But He, the Master, appointed me the "first" among you… And I must obey Him first of all and more than I have to obey anybody else. And you must obey. And with my good sense of a fisherman I tell you to part, not as you have understood, mistaking my soothing words for fiery ones, but to go away for a short while and be
alone to meditate… You were behind us all from Bether to the valley. Do that again… The Master ahead… you in the rear… we… the nonentities
[as Judas calls them], in the middle… All one has to do to understand and to calm down is to be alone… Listen to me… It is better for everybody, and for you first of all…» And he takes him by the arm and pulls him out of the group, saying: «There, stay there while we join the Master. Then… come
slowly, slowly… and you will see that the storm will soon be over» and he leaves him, joining his companions who are already a few metres ahead.
[Peter says to the other apostles:] «Ugh! I perspired more speaking to him than walking… What temperament! Shall we ever be able to get something from him?»
[Judas Thaddeus, Jesus' cousin/brother, says:] «Never, Simon. My brother persists in keeping him. But… He will never get any good out of him» replies Judas Thaddeus to him.
[Andrew says:] «He is a real punishment for us!» whispers Andrew, and he concludes: «John and I are almost afraid of him and we always keep quiet fearing further quarrels.»
[Bartholomew says:] «It is in fact the best policy» says Bartholomew.
[Judas Thaddeus says:] «I just cannot keep quiet» admits Thaddeus.
[Peter says:] «I am not very successful either… But I have found the secret to become so» says Peter.
«Which? Tell us…» they all say.
[Peter says:] «Working like an ox at the plough. Even a useless job… Something that serves to get off my chest the load that is brewing up inside me… something that is not Judas.»
[James of Zebedee says:] «Ah! I understand! That is why you made such havoc of plants when descending to the valley! That’s why, eh?» asks James of Zebedee.
[Peter says:] «That’s it… But today… here… I had nothing to break without causing damage. There are only fruit trees and it would be a sin to spoil them… I worked three times as hard… breaking myself… so that I would not be the old Simon of Capernaum… And my bones are aching…»
Bartholomew and the Zealot make the same gesture and utter the same words: they embrace Peter exclaiming: «And you are astonished that He appointed you the first among us? You are a teacher to us…»
[Peter says:] «Me? Because of that?… A trifle!… I am a poor man… I ask you only to love me by giving me wise advice, simple loving advice. Love and simplicity that I may become like you… And only for His sake as He is already so grieved…»
[Matthew says:] «You are right. That we at least may not be the cause of His grief!» exclaims Matthew.

 

 
Vide também Vida e Obra de Maria Valtorta
Nota sobre a fonte: Maria Valtorta foi uma mística católica italiana. Durante sua vida, ela foi agraciada com revelações de Jesus Cristo sobre o Evangelho, e também de Nossa Senhora, do Espírito Santo e de vários santos e anjos.